No Gifts Necessary

April 24, 2018

While perusing Facebook last week, I came across a mom blog titled "5 Things You Should Know About a 'Please, No Gifts' Birthday Party". The blog (originally posted here) immediately caught my attention. My youngest turns two on Saturday, and I had just put "Gifts are not necessary! Just come and have fun!" on the invites, and I genuinely meant it. 

As I read the post, a sense of validation came over me. So, other moms are over birthday presents too? I'm not mean and horrible for asking people not to bring my child presents? It's like I was getting a virtual high five. Don't get me wrong. I am super grateful we have friends and family that adore our children enough to buy them gifts, but our house is out of control. We have more toys than we have room, and I'm worried our children are going to turn into that Ryan kid from YouTube, if we aren't more careful. 

When I tell you not to bring any toys, I truly mean it. Trust me. Our children are not deprived. They'll get gifts from us and grandparents. But from friends and extended family, they don't need things. They just need fun! Come and play the games. Come and stuff yourself with food (because our parties always have killer spreads). Come and eat a plate full of cupcakes. One of my favorite birthday memories is watching my friends stuff french fries up their noses while my mom took pictures of them and everyone laughed until they cried. I can't remember a single gift I got that day, but I can remember how ridiculously awesome that party was. (Did I mention my mom took pictures?)

If you just absolutely can't stand coming without something, take the original blogger's advice and bring something like one of the following:

• A card your child has colored, glued, cut and made just for the birthday kiddo
• A card that sings or lights up
• One (1) balloon – could even be new, uninflated balloon taped to a homemade card!
• A printed photo or hand drawing of your child and the birthday boy/girl
• A “coupon” for a playdate

I guarantee you my children will love any of these, and I'm pretty sure any other child will too. Let's show our kids how to enjoy the moments because I promise they'll thank us for it later. 

Parent Fail 101

April 5, 2018

This morning, as I'm wrestling my nearly two year old during a diaper change, my four year old comes running in the room. He's naked as a jaybird and waving his tiny underpants in the air while yelling, "Look! They've got Buzz Lightyear on them!" After declaring how amazing they were, he sat down and immediately started pulling them up his little legs. For most kids, putting on your underwear is a pretty normal ritual. Around ages 2-3, children have developed the basic gross motor skills needed to dress themselves. By ages 4-5, they usually put on their own shoes and socks. For my kiddo, it's just not happening, and we (his parents) are totally the reason why.

He was our first. We were very naive and very busy. We both worked and were usually scrambling to get from one place to the next. In the process, we ended up doing everything for this child. We fed him. We dressed him. We cleaned up for him. And now, we're kicking ourselves a little bit. Dressing a 43 pound, 3 and 1/2 foot toddler is a major workout and can be extremely frustrating. So, when he put his underwear on right side out and not backwards this morning, I saw it as an opportunity. "Alright man! Good job! You did that so well. Do you think you could go find some pants and put those on too?" He was in his room sifting through drawers before I had finished the question.

He ran back with a pair of shorts in hand and pulled them on all by himself. He was super proud of himself, so I directed him to his shirts. He picked one out and brought it too me. He also picked out shoes and socks. He needed help with all three, but I didn't care. He fought half the battle without putting up a fuss, and I was ecstatic! What made it even better was seeing what pieces he had picked out for himself. His shorts were navy, and he had picked a black, Lightning McQueen shirt. His socks were gray and covered in Pokemon, and he requested to wear his favorite navy boots. The final touch was a straw fedora with a blue and white ribbon covered in stars.


It's really tough to admit a parenting fail. In doing so, we have to own up to making a mistake, and people just love doing that don't they? I know this is my fault, but I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Instead, we're going to learn from it. We're gonna work on it one small step at a time!

What's something you wish you had done differently? Share it and help other parents in their journey!