Pixar is giving me all the feels.

April 26, 2017

For a 32 year old woman, I have a lot of sentimental emotions for Lightning McQueen. Yes, you read that right. I said, Lightning McQueen - as in Ka-Chow - as in #95 - as in a computer animated, precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. If you still have zero clue what I'm referring to here, I'm talking about the animated race car from the Pixar/Disney movie series, Cars.

Lightning is a cherry red stock car with a bad attitude that gets stuck in a small town full of some fun characters that eventually help him see what's really important about life. It's a great story, and it's fun to watch. But, this isn't why I'm talking about a fictional race car.

This is why. 

This precious little dude is obsessed with Cars. Cars 1 and 2 are his favorite movies. He owns almost every single die cast model from the movies and the Cars Toons shorts. He has hats, shirts, shorts, tennis shoes, luggage, towels, bed sheets, furniture, curtains, pajamas, and even toddler briefs that feature the faces of Lightning McQueen and friends.  He knows all the racers and Radiator Springs crew names by memory. And, bless his heart - he goes around humming the instrumental theme song to Cars 2. 

This kid is invested 100% into the Cars franchise. He asks me if we can go to the World Grand Prix at least 3 times a week. When we found out Cars 3 was happening, we all got ridiculously excited. The teaser trailer came out at the end of last year. As soon as the link was live, we piled up on the couch and crowded around my phone to watch. Cars raced around a track. The animation was better than ever. It looked super real. All of a sudden tires start screeching. McQueen is up in the air, upside down, eyes closed, and breathing what may possibly be his last breath. My little dude's face turns cold, and his eyes are huge. Tears are beginning to form as he quietly, but frantically says, "Oh no....mommy?" It's too late. I'm crying. 

Come on Pixar! What have you done? I. Am. FREAKING. Out! How did I just let me 3 year old watch his favorite Disney character of all time and all around hero have a horrible, life changing accident in vivid animation? I couldn't get the trailer to go away fast enough. He was so upset, and I felt like dirt. His little eyes were still watery as I explained that Lightning just had an accident because he was running too fast and would totally fine. After a few minutes, all was well, and we was off to something else. I, however, was not fine. Why was I crying? Could the death of an animated race car seriously bring me to my knees? The answer to that question is "most definitely yes". Not because of my love for McQueen, but because of my love for my little guy. 

Isn't it funny how we, as mothers, completely lose ourselves sometimes in our kids? I would do absolutely anything to make sure McQueen is okay in this next movie. I will straight up march on Pixar if he's not! No sir, John Lasseter. You will not be making my baby cry today. I'm laughing as I write this, but it is so true. Why else would I watch Cars 2 a thousand times in a row without blinking an eye. Is it because I really think the concept of Mater being a spy is awesome? Most definitely not. (I'm really hoping Cars 3 pretends Cars 2 didn't happen.) It's because I love that child and never want him to hurt. I'm not completely naive. He'll feel these emotions one day. But, I will do my best to get him through them fairly unscathed. 

Crying along with my toddler over a cartoon makes me think of Jesus crying over the death of Lazarus. His compassion is definitely something to emulate. Being more like Jesus is something I strive for on a daily basis. I fail...a lot. When I triumph, I praise the Father for sending us such a wonderful example. 

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.

Ephesians 5:1-2

One of my constant prayer requests is to be more compassionate. I guess it's only fitting that God used a Disney character to teach me lesson. He definitely gets me.

Coffee Talk

April 15, 2017

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting 40 days and 40 nights, He was hungry. The tempter came to Him and said, "If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread. 

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God'. 

Every morning, I either wake up to a toddler holding my face and telling me he's thirsty or an 11 month old yelling from the nursery - don't worry, they're cute. So, it's totally worth it.  As I attempt to get my eyes open and become coherent, I drag myself out of bed to get the toddler (and myself, who am I kidding?) to the potty. We go greet the little one, change diapers, get dressed for the day, and go downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. After grabbing juice, milk, yogurt, Puffs, and feeding the cat, I finally get to start a pot of coffee - the life juice that keeps me going.

When I started to think about what to give up for Lent this year, coffee wasn't even on my radar. I've tried giving up food/drink before, and I failed miserably. I was trying to think of something that would bring me closer to the Lord. Something that would remind me to reach for Him - not something that might trim a couple of inches off my waistline or be an afterthought. I thought about this for days, never once consulting God.

On a random day in February, I was headed home from errands and had just gone through Starbucks for a venti iced latte. Both kids were snoozing in the back of the van, so it was actually quiet. I started to think about Lent again.  This time I actually decided to talk to God about it. What can I do, Lord? With a sip of my latte, He answered me. Coffee.

It's the first thing I do for myself in the mornings. When I'm tired or stressed, it's the first thing I reach for throughout the day. When I want to reward myself, I drive through Starbucks. I could feel the Spirit nudging as I took that sip. God wants to be what I reach for at the start of my day. God wants to be what I reach for when I'm tired and stressed. God wants to be what I reach for when I'm happy.  It was like getting hit with a ton of bricks. (I'm still in shock that He answered me. We all want God to speak to us like He did with Moses or Samuel. The fact that I got a push from the Holy Spirit has me awestruck.)

So on the first day of Lent, I was in Disney World. Every park has a Starbucks. I had even packed a custom Disney Starbucks shirt. (I'm not kidding either. #obsessed) But, I stood strong. No coffee. No espresso. I even passed up the French press coffee at Victoria & Albert's that I had been waiting for since we made the reservation last year. It was rough, but it made me lean on God. After returning home, my coffee pot looked so lonely. (As did the Chip coffee cup I bought in Disney.) When I passed it in the mornings, I was reminded to thank Jesus for resisting Satan's temptations in the desert. Every time I drove by Starbucks, I was reminded to thank Jesus for my salvation. It may sound trivial, but to me it was a revelation. Because of this one, insignificant sacrifice I made for 6 weeks, I now remember to reach for God and give thanks in all instances.

Today is Easter. The baby woke up about an hour earlier than usual, so I came down to the kitchen to make the him a bottle. My eyes were half open, and I'm pretty sure I may have missed a couple of steps on the way down from my room. As I poured the milk, I looked out our kitchen window. The most beautiful, pink sunrise was coming up over the mountain. Standing in awe of His glory, I prayed - bottle in hand - and thanked God for giving us His only son. The coffee pot was empty behind me, but the greatest sacrifice ever made was the only thing on my mind.

Think of a Wonderful Thought

March 9, 2017

(Full disclosure: I started this on March 9th and didn't finish it until a month later. Adulting is hard.)

A little over a week ago, our family made the trek to Walt Disney World. It wasn't our first time, and it certainly won't be our last. I initially wrote a "Countdown to Disney" blog, but I thought it was a bit trite, so it's long gone. If my boys read this later, I want them to truly understand what these trips with them and my husband mean to me. The initial countdown just wasn't doing it for me. So, here we go.

My husband and I have been to Disney more times than we can count. I completely understand this isn't the norm. Disney vacations are not the cheapest of vacations, and we are very grateful for the trips we've been able to experience. Phillip's trips started much earlier than mine and came more frequent. Before we were engaged, I had been 3 times. One of those was with family, and the other two were with our high school marching band. After high school, we both went with some friends on our senior trip, and I'm pretty sure we've been almost every year since.

In 2003, we were engaged in front of Cinderella Castle during one of the first showings of Wishes. In 2005, we were married at Disney's Wedding Pavilion.

In 2012, we found out we were having our oldest while staying at Pop Century Resort. In 2013, we announced his pending arrival. 

Little brother was announced in Fantasyland in 2015. 

Both boys have now been multiple times. They've both experienced first haircuts at Harmony Barbershop. They've both had magical moments with Cast Members and characters. They've both thrown up either on the way down to or on the way back from Florida. (Thanks little dudes.)

During this last trip, I had a moment of realization and complete bliss. Of course, I immediately posted it on Instagram....because #2017.

I seriously don't know why God chose this place for us. It's brought so much happiness to our little family, and I love it so much. My only hope is that our boys can understand it's more than just a theme park to us. It's the setting for our story. It's our movie backdrop. It's a happy thought.  

XO